Wednesday, March 27, 2013

20 Questions About Bangkok's Nightlife Answered

So it's been already 1 year since I started this blog. And I tell you, I wish I started it when I was in my mid 20's. Because it has been a lot of fun. But I am getting too old to jump around from one bar to one oil massage to one soapy and on and on.

This blog is just an add on to my website Bangkok Red Eye which is an all around guide to the city's red light districts. Even though I try to fill as much info I can on this blog, it's not easy. For one thing, Thailand's red light districts doesn't change that fast. Although the faces of the players in the bars and body to body massage parlors are changing the game has also changed with working girls becoming cunning.

And even though there are a lot of information on my website and this blog, there are still many questions asked by visitors. And I can understand why.

Before the age of the Internet it wasn't too easy to find out any information on Thailand's infamous nightlife. But we've all heard raunchy stories and the carnal delights that have made Bangkok a hot spot for sex tourists.

Today it's so easy to find what you need simply from typing a search phrase into google or any other available search engine. Eventually most have found my blog. And as much as I try to write new posts and update, many questions from readers are rolling into to my email box.

This is one of the reasons why I created this post. From the emails I've been receiving I have a feeling that most think I'm some sort of authority or an expert in the field of whorology. And that every night I am in the company of Thai prostitutes that revolve in and out the doors of my home.

However, if you really know me, you can see that I am just really just a normal average Joe that messes around once in awhile. And if my interests are peaked maybe 2 or 3 times a week in a month.

My personal record for visiting go go bars and body to body massage parlors was for every single day for 2 weeks straight. That was around 5 years ago when a good friend of mine asked me to take him around Bangkok's naughty nightlife to celebrate his divorce. Bear in mind I've been in this country for 12 years. So overall, I think I am a pretty good boy.

So as you can see I bounce around and have fun from time to time personally. However when friends come over for a visit it's a whole different story. As a result I still have a good idea of what's going on. However as you'll find out below I am a creature of habit and frequent places that I know I will have a good time.

But even then, I'll venture out once in awhile to check what's new and share my personal experiences here on this blog.

1. Where to Find Hot Beautiful Thai Girls that are Cheap

Here is a question I get about 5 times a month. In the beginning I would answer in a polite manner. Like, "Hi there, it's impossible to find a very attractive Thai girl who would go all night with you for 500THB."

Through the course of the year since this blog has started it's getting kind of annoying and I decided to take off the kid gloves. Now my answers are more like, "Are you serious? You should stay home and jerk off."

Some might think I'm cold. But sometimes a bit of tough love goes a long way.

Guys just have to be realistic and have some common sense. I bet that whenever you hear a story about  guys who get drugged and robbed by supposed cheap hookers are the same guys who think they can get laid with attractive girls for 500THB.

From Pattayadailynews.com
Check out this story; 5 guys robbed by 1 Thai hooker. A Thai prostitute that says it's okay to screw 5 guys for a measly 1000THB has something up her sleeves. 1000THB for 5 guys! That's 200 Baht per head. Seriously??

Now if your question is, "Where can I find an ugly Thai hookers for 500THB?" then I have an answer. You can find them on Sukhumvit, usually outside of the S15 Sukumvit Hotel or standing outside of the Westin Grande. In Pattaya you can find many on Beach Road.

Hot girls = money. This is true all over the world my friends. Especially in Thailand. Whether you're in go go bars or Q Bar you're shit out of luck if 500THB is all you have to spend for a screw.

I know there are a lot of guys that visit Thailand and having sex with 500THB hookers. They know those prostitute are not the best looking. However they all know to be careful in the company of one.

2. Where can I find Gam? I think I've fallen in love with her...?

Ahh lovely Gam the go go bar girl has already retired. And I'm happy she did. She deserves the good life. Gam is no longer looking for sex tourists as life partners. She learned long ago that is not a good equation.

Today she is self dependent and does not require us mongoloids humping away at her to put food on the table.

3. Where can I go find ladyboys with the biggest cocks?


Right now my dad is spinning in his grave knowing that I am dispensing info on ladyboys. Now I am not a pro in this field nor ever dabbled around with cocks in frocks but I have seen a lot of shemales standing outside of Casanova that look like they've come out of prison. So they still look quite masculine so it's a sure bet they still have their units intact. Whether they are hung or not is a different matter.

But Casanova inside Nana Entertainment Plaza on Suk soi 4 does have a reputation for what you are searching for.

4. Are there any soapy or oily massage parlors with ladyboys?

As far as I know there are non. In all odds there probably a few working in legitimate massage shops but which ones I can't remember.

I remember strolling around Sukhumvit soi 8, soi 11 and soi 31 where I spotted usually 1 ladyboy. But I really have no clue as to whether or not they offer extras. Since there seems to such a huge demand I wouldn't be surprised to find a shop with exclusive ladyboy lineup in the future though.

But I do know that there are many legitimate oil massage shops along Sukhumvit that hire femboys. Just take a look around but to be quite honest I don't know if they offer extras.

5. Which guest friendly hotel in Bangkok and Pattaya have hookers that I can order up to my room?

There is no such thing as hotels in Thailand where you can order hookers to your room (as far as I know) like you would with food from a room service menu. Not really sure why this question gets asked a lot at first.

But after thinking a bit I remember there are hotels in Malaysia and Singapore where hookers would go around knocking on the doors of certain rooms. Obviously the hotel, or at least the guy at the hotel's front desk is in on it. Because they have the info on how many guests are staying at a room including guests gender.

So hotel owners, managers etc. do not have any vested interests in providing prostitutes for their guests in Thailand. But the hotel's lower staff members such as a bell boy would probably have a phone number or two of working girls.

Ruamchitt Hotel - Head to the basement and you'll find Thermae Bar with many Thai Freelancers
The closest hotel names that I know without stepping outside of the hotel grounds for Thai hookers is Ruamchitt Hotel on Suk Soi 15 and the Ambassador Hotel on Suk soi 11.

Besides those two hotels, I suggest getting off your lazy ass and go out.

6. Are Thai girls into threesomes? I want to bring my girlfriend (non-Thai) to Bangkok for some fun.

Most Thai working girls are not into rug munching. But if the money is right they'll eat an acre. So organizing a threesome whether you are BYOW (bringing your own wife) is absolutely possible however the experience may not be like a scene from a porn movie as you would think. I've had threesomes with freelance girls that don't know each other at all. They were a bit inhibited because they didn't know each other. Talk about awkward moments.

However, you can really luck out if you find 2 girls who know each other well. So they won't be as shy. So if you add in your own girlfriend you may not find the experience to be as you had hoped.

You know what, from my experience, whenever I find two girls that already know each other, usually one is fugly and the other is doable. Not really easy to find two hot chicks into threesomes. Unless you got shit loads of cash like a Thai playboy.

7. I am from India. Will a Thai oil massage girl like me?

Well, if you pay them they will service you. Whether they will like you or not is a different story. If you're a gentleman, sure they'll respect you. This is true whether you're Indian, European, American or Martian.

8. Hi, I'm a first timer visiting Bangkok. Should I pack my own condoms or are the ones sold in Thailand adequate for big guys?

Hmm... are the condoms for you or for another guy who's banging you. Just kidding. I'm assuming the condoms are for you.

I'm not one to boast but I think I'm above average. I use Durex brand condoms which is popular all over the world.

In particular I use Durex fetherlite the most. As you can see on top left corner it says 'Easy-On' which are a bit larger. It's thin enough too. There's also a fetherlite warm version too which has a special lubricant. You get a little bit of funky tingly feeling sensation.

Durex fetherlite
Another type I use often is the Durex sensation. It's a bit tighter in fit but has lots of little bumps on the condom for the ladies. No I'm not the freaky sort but a lot of the bar girls and massage girls I mess around with love it.

Each boxes of specialized Durex condoms cost about 75THB in Boots, Watsons and of course the always dependable 7 Elevens which are found on almost every corner of big cities in Thailand.

Durex sensation - the ladies like...
Of course you can bring your own condoms from home. But don't be surprised if you bring your own to an oily or a soapy and find out that you are not allowed to use what you brought.

Look at it from the perspective of the ladies. How do they know if the condom you brought has holes in it or messed around with in other ways. Ladies that don't mind will still probably want to take a good look at it in the wrapper before use.

And one last thing, if you are one of the lucky bastards that are truly well endowed, girls in oil massage parlors and soapies may deny you service and request that you choose another lady. So if you're packing a lot of heat it's a blessing and a curse in Thailand.

9. I booked a hotel in BKK that has no in room safe. Can I trust safety deposit box near reception? If I get robbed by a hooker in my room or a hotel staff steals something from deposit box what should I do?

This is one of those questions where there's no easy answer. In the past before having a place of my own in Bangkok I've stayed in a lot of different hotels. I mostly stay in the 3 to 4 star range hotels. Sometimes if the price is just right I'll splurge a bit on a 5 star. And all of those hotels have an electronic room safe. Of all the times I never had any problems at all as most hotels I believe are quite secure.

But you should be careful of whom you bring into your room. Check out this news article and you'll see that most thieves/hookers are well prepared to crack that room safe.

By the way, those victims supposedly had $40,000USD inside a room safe. I think the victims fluffed up the numbers because people with that kind of money do not stay in cheap hotels. Just take a look at the photos of the place they were staying at.

From Pattayadailynews.com
The victims also did not say anything when the hookers refused to leave their Thai ID cards with security. If security is of utmost importance to you I suggest staying at a hotel in Bangkok and especially in Pattaya since crimes against sex tourists are higher that are guest friendly. I would turn away any hooker that refuses to hand over their IDs.

I'm assuming you are staying at a budget hotel. In that case you're just going to have to bring a good lock to secure the belongings in your luggage. And in this day and age there really is no need to bring a boat load of cash with you. Thailand, particularly Bangkok and Pattaya where you'll need the cash has plenty of ATMs to withdraw cash.

10. Should I worry about HIV and other STD while getting involved with Thai hookers?

No doubt this is a sensitive issue. If you're messing around a lot with whores, you're at risk. There is no question about it. Here's what I do to minimize the risk.

If you've read my blog posts, you'll find out that I always go to the same places. Though I am starting to be a bit venturous due to a series of fortunate events. Anyways, I stick to long established oil and soapy massage parlors as well as go go bars.

Businesses that have been around for a long time are strict on keeping girls clean. As I've written many times, if there's ever a place where a girl is passing the nasties on to customers, many people will find out. A major loss of business would be a result and the bar or massage parlor will shutter its doors. Because it is the establishment's responsibility to make sure their ladies are clean by making sure they are properly screened before they can put on those bikinis.

So whenever there is a new place that opens up, I typically wait until a year before I give it a try. I know some people might think that's too extreme. Well, it's my life. I also know working girls move around to new establishments. For example 101 Premier Bangkok massage where a girl I've been visiting for awhile used to work in Angels Massage.

When she confirmed that the establishment require strict medical check ups from all the ladies employed then I feel a bit more confident that it's a safer place to visit.

With street hookers, it's a total different story. Thai freelancers are cheaper, no bar fine, no need to pay for lady drinks. Those are the pros. The cons, you're at a higher risk. Don't ever let a street hooker tempt you to pick her up because she's offering sex without a rubber. This does happen.

You'll be pissing needles or worse.

11. For a first timer visiting Bangkok's body to body massage parlors and go go bars, what is one mistake I should avoid?

Never tell a girl it's your first time in the establishment. I've been noticing a trend, especially in oily massage parlors where girls are starting to skimp on services. This has already happened in most soapy massage parlors starting from the past few years.

If you tell a girl you are a first timer, there is a possibility you may not get the full treatment. Sure you'll get laid because that's what you paid for. However, you may not get a full body rub down during the bulk of the time you paid for. They will just assume you don't know any better.

There are girls that are bold enough now to try and skip out on the massage. I've experienced this quite a few times. Now I'm not here to out any working girls. What happened was once we got to the room we proceeded straight to sex. Which is fine by me.

1 minute later (just kidding...) we started talking about different shit. I glimpsed at my watch and saw there was at least 25 minutes left from the 1 hour oil massage I paid for.

I started to get fed up a bit waiting for my massage. Sure, a massage from a hooker is not worth much, but I want what I paid for so I took the bottle of oil, placed it in her hands and laid down on the bed. I can chat lying down just as well as I can sitting up.

In the opening of this blog post I mentioned that girls are getting a lot more cunning. For instance if you bar fined a bar girl for long time which technically means they have to stay with you until morning hours, you'll find that some will make some kind of excuse to skedaddle way before the cock crows.

This type of occurrences happen more with newbies. Though the ladies are starting to get brazen enough to pull this off on guys who've been around the block more than once.

Some bar girls are beginning to ask for money up front when they get to the room. This is not a big deal if you're only paying for short time.

Long time is a whole different story. So what can you do to prevent a bar girl from ditching early? Well I would first wait and see if shes asks for money upfront. Normal procedure for customers is to pay up when the time is up. You can simply refuse which might result into some sort of Mexican stand off.

Before I hand over the cash, I make it clear to her that she is to leave in the morning. I pay half of the negotiated long time price and half when it's time for her to leave. Just to make sure you have the full amount show the other half. Because I can understand most girls want money upfront because there are assholes that don't have the money. However, some girls will abuse this.

And remember, when you are paying for long time you are paying for 2 shots. So that's what I would do if a girl asks me for money up front.

This has never happened before in the past as far as I know. Or maybe it has but I've been lucky enough all those years to never experience it. But within the last few years I am seeing this trend. As I mentioned in the opening of this blog, girls working in this industry are becoming more cunning if not more lazy.

With all that said, the only place that I go where I know girls work well to satisfy their customers is Akane Fashion Massage. They don't provide full service, but whatever service they do provide is simply tops. Most of the girls working in Akane are not the best lookers, but they work hard and aim to please. And their rates for services are not that expensive either considering you get 2 shots.

12. I have a week in BKK and my budget is $1000USD. What can I do with it to have the best experience?

So assuming a week is 5 days. And I'm also assuming this $1000USD is completely allocated towards payments to hookers.

So that's $200USD per day/night. That's not a bad budget at all. Consider when visiting a go go bar you're going to be spending about $100USD when you pay a bar fine + short time rate. So that extra $100USD can be spent on drinks. I would say you're in good shape budge wise even if you're staying for a full 7 days.

As to what you can do for the best experience, well that's not an easy question to answer since I don't know your likes and dislikes.

I'm assuming this is your first trip to Bangkok. I suggest just checking out the places for yourself. You'll eventually make up your own mind on what you'd like to do.

13. Hi Jim, my lifetime dream is to have an orgy. But I don't want to go at it alone. Would you be willing to join me and be my wingman? All expenses paid of course. I don't want to invite anybody that personally knows me. But judging from your blog you seem like a stand up guy. Again, money is not an obstacle.

First off, thank you for the kind words. I'm flattered.

Second, isn't that a line  notorious serial killer John Wayne Gacy use to lure his victims before he raped and murdered them?

But I have to decline the offer. The only times I've been in another room with naked men were in saunas. And even then none of them had visible erections pointed in my vicinity.

And the thought of crossing swords in the heat of the moment just really grosses me out. And never say money is not an obstacle for there is never enough money to pay for my subsequent trauma.


14. Any ideas for daytime action?

Blow job bars, they open around the afternoon time though the best looking talents come around later.

Or you can take a walk around the Sukhumvit soi 5 to soi 7 area in the afternoon. I call it the bus stop because city buses do stop right on that spot. You'll find African hookers in that area too even in the daytime. They don't float my boat though.

And most oil massage parlors in the Phrom Phong area also open around 12pm. And because most of the massage girls live in the vicinity or even in apartment rooms in the same building there is always someone to service customers right from opening time.

15. After paying a bar fine for long time a go go bar, what's the proper etiquette before taking her back for a shag?


That's really all up to the customer once that bar fine is paid up. If there's time you can take her to a disco. Grab dinner at one of the many new snazzy wine bars opening up in town.

Go bowling if that's your thing or catch the latest movie. Sort of like a true first date/girlfriend experience. Except you're pretty much guaranteed to get laid.

16. What are your thoughts on falling in love with a bar girl?


I know a few friends who've made a successful relationship with former bar girls. What's the key to their success? They have a steady source of income and are quite faithful.

I also know a shit load of guys who've taken the jump in starting a relationship with hookers. What was there downfall? They didn't have enough money and faithfulness is not in their vocabulary.

In a way, starting a relationship with a Thai hooker is just the same as if you're starting a relationship with any average non working Thai girl.

Just a word of caution, if you're thinking about getting married to a Thai girl there's a good chance you might be caring for their families too.


17. Pattaya hookers Vs. Bangkok hookers? Trying to decide which place to go with limited time. First trip to Thailand.

Soi LK Metro in Pattaya

In the years past I would easily say that Bangkok has the best lookers. However, Pattaya today has changed a whole lot and attracting a lot of really good looking talent.

Please check out my blog post on Soi LK Metro. I love that little slice of Pattaya which isn't all that too far from Walking Street's clubs and go go bars or 500THB bargain basement hookers on Beach road if they float your boat.

Soi LK Metro has a handful of go go bars in the area with an excellent line up of bar girls like Champagne, Sugar Sugar and Showgirls which are all excellent go go bars in Pattaya. 


18. Do legitimate traditional Thai massage shops offer happy endings?


This is not an easy question to answer. But if you're staying in an area near the red light districts, like in Silom where Patpong is or Nana or Sukhumvit you will find massage shops that look legit.

From what I can gather, if you come into a shop as a loner, the shop manager will probably match you up with a younger massage girl that provides happy endings for tips. If you come in with your mother-in-law there's then you'll probably get a granny. Whether the granny gives offers relief or not and you accept is all up to you but please keep it to yourself.

The only time that you know absolutey sure that rub and tugs are not on offer is when you see a sign inside the shop with big letters that say:


19. You make a lot of hotel recommendations. Of all the hotels on Sukhumvit which hotel that is guest friendly in the $100USD to $200USD range would you personally choose.

This is an easy one. With that price tag you should book a room at the Grand Centre Point Sukhumvit. This 4 star hotel is attached to one of Bangkok's newest malls.

There's a nice big pool, decent fitness center with brand new cardio equipment plus if you book a room that includes breakfast you won't regret it. They've got a top breakfast spread with so many choices of quality food you can stuff your face with.

Soi Cowboy is a 5 minute walk, Nana Plaza 10 minutes for go go bar girls. Thermae Bar by Sukhumvit soi 15 under the Ruamchitt Hotel is a 5 minute walk for picking up freelancers. MRT and BTS trains stations are just right out the door. So the location is superb hunting ground for whoring around.

If you book ahead of time you can get a superior room type with breakfast for around $140USD or a less at Agoda.com. The Grand Centre Point Sukhumvit is simply the best all around bar girl friendly hotel in Bangkok.

20. Are there places that you're keeping secrets and not sharing?


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